Weekend, dreams and Rage

Finally DSL connectivity! We’ve been without internet all weekend. Clint had research to do and emails to send out to his men’s social work group. Lucky for him he could hop the bus and be at school in no time. Which he did and took Slade with him to the library. We had all day Sunday to ourselves. I went to Saturday night service and worked the bake sale. I was SOOOOO late! Clint left to Block buster to return movies and he and Jack didn’t get home for another hour! He went grocery shopping and I’m sure perused every aisle in BB. Anyway, I was happy to catch the Sat. service and have all day Sunday to knit. We had Amanda and her family over for dinner. Clint made the best green chile and pork! We ordered HOT green chile a few months ago and it’s like gold in our freezer – we dare not waste it! Anyway, mandy LOVED it even after just coming off a 10 year vegetarian diet. We had beans, rice and a sweet corn bread bake stuff. It was a great dinner with friends. We need to get back in the habit of hosting more often, I always forget how much fun it is.

I had a weird dream last night. I need to write them down because they are so weird but sometimes they are inspiring. I have 2 in the draft folder from last year that I just read last week and I’m glad I wrote them down – pretty powerful stuff.

Jack’s best friend that moved away for this school year was in town this weekend. They were able to get together before the soccer game and play. His mom and I had a nice conversation while they played. They moved away so the dad could go to seminary school for an Episcopalian Priest or whatever they are called…bishop? She is just having a hard time with the whole thing. She asked me if I ever felt “rage” from being home all day with the kids especially now with Clint’s schedule. I didn’t think it was a weird question especially coming from her. They are typical ann arborites well I shouldn’t say “typical.” Just because they live in a million dollar home they are very different from other people in the neighborhood. Anyway, she is used to having an ‘au pair’ or someone living in their basement in exchange for childcare. So this new life style is taking a toll on her. Husband is gone more hours than they ever expected and she’s homeschooling to boot! I told her that Clint and I don’t know any other life style. We hit the ground running 12 years ago and we are still in that mode. Clint being in grad school isn’t so different for us as it would be for other families. I’m just happy to be able to do it here where we are surrounded by people we know and love. She called me a true heroine.

But to answer her question – I told her I don’t feel rage over that , but I do feel rage over anyone who tries to demote my standing as a mom. People who think being JUST a mom is fine but what about going to school and having degrees decorating your walls? Or people who ask if I will have regret that I didn’t do something more with my life. There is so much time - you could have like 4 or 5 10 year careers in one life time. That’s a lot of careers! I know there is something that I will be doing later on in life and if I miss the opportunity, I will be presented with another one. For the time being – I will enjoy every minute of this time with my family and not worry about what other’s think about being JUST a mom. That is probably the single most issue that will make me so angry and so upset that I might rip someone apart. Makes my blood boil just thinking about it!
So, I will choose to keep my head high and not let naysayers take away the joy I live in.

I'm off to dumpster dive in the recycling bin for Jack's fundraiser envelope. (i tossed it in w/ the newspapers)